Hey, Yoo hoo! Where do I mail this?

John had worked for the Post Office so long even the crack of his ass looked like a letter slot
This now gives new meaning to the motto:
Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night nor people shoving their mail up yuor ass stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds.

It could have been worse that dog could ahve taken a chunk out of his ass.